One of Yahoo's most popular videos was yours truly on ABC NEWS NOW earlier this month answering your questions about college grads as well as debt!
Here's the scoop:
Q. Our daughter just graduated from UCLA and we’re very proud of her. But even though she has a prestigious degree, she still hasn’t been able to locate work. Should we allow her to move in with us until she finds employment?
Bill and Carol from Quartz Hills, CA via facebook
Ellie: This is a tough one! As a mom of kids in this age group, I know it’s a fine line between enabling and empowering and it’s definitely one of those individual decisions. What may be right for a particular child may not be right for another one. I think you ought to support her emotionally and psychologically, letting her know you believe in her. You can also offer to help with resumes or job research. But I would make the offer to have her move in with you as a last resort only. Furthermore, if she does move in with you, it’s important to sit down ahead of time, come up with a responsibility/income agreement and have both parties subscribe to the guidelines.
Q. My husband and I have a son who graduated last year and could not find work, so he moved in with us until he could find employment. He found a modest job, and is not making very much money. He decided that continuing to live with us would be a better financial option than paying rent on a limited income. I love my son, and he’s only 23 right now, but I’m afraid of a “Failure to Launch” syndrome and I need to know what you would advise me to do.
Allana from Lancaster, PA via online contact form
ELLIE: OK, the Failure to Launch syndrome, it’s every parent’s nightmare. We finally have an empty nest, then boomerang children come back to inhabit a place where they no longer naturally fit. I think, Allana, that it is imperative that you and your husband develop an comprehensive exit strategy for junior. Make sure this plan requires that he pays room and board with you, that he develop a clear budget and make himself accountable to you (while he’s living at home) and then be clear about D-day. The day he will depart. Be loving but firm. Remember that the decisions you are implementing with him today will be the precedence you set for tomorrow. You and you alone, enable the boomerang effect, yet you also have the power to put a stop to that boomerang before it’s ever launched. Then you won’t have a “Failure to Launch.”
Q: I am a 26 year old single girl with a bachelor's degree but not yet a Master's. I am working with children in a library setting currently and am considering various Master's programs. (Library Science included). I would have to take out loans for the program though, and I am not sure that taking on that debt would be a wise thing, even though it would lead to a professional job. What is your advice for women around my age who eventually want to marry and have a family and do not want the burden of school debt? I have read some of your books and very much appreciate your insights and time.
Jen Crouse submitted via Online Contact Form
Ellie: It's admirable that you desire to go back to college for a master's while you are still in your twenties and your work with children sounds very gratifying. Ellie usually recommends no more than 10K in student loan debt for any program (bachelors or masters). Instead, you could look into some of the following:
Step 1
Apply for a scholarship. There are merit based graduate school scholarships out there so go to www.salliemae.com which lists almost 2 million scholarships. Talk to the admissions office at the college or university at which you'd like to apply. They can give you advice on applying for their own scholarships (if they have them) or point you to the appropriate federal and/or state scholarship programs.
Step 2
Look into a fellowship or assistantship. Many colleges and universities offer programs that enable you to get a master's degree while doing research or assisting professors in the department in which you wish to study. This is a viable option that also enhances your hands-on experience in your chosen field.
Step 3
Talk to your employer. Many employers are willing to foot the bill for a master's degree, especially an MBA (Master of Business Administration). Talk to someone in your company's Human Resources department to get more information. Or another option is to talk to a military recruiter to join the guard or reserves. The Army, Air Force and Navy will pay up to $65,000 in student loan debts if you qualify for the program.
Q. My husband and I want to help with our son’s college expenses (he graduates in two years) and we don’t want him to be straddled with huge student loans. Several of our friends and other family members have said, “Just take out a second mortgage or use the equity in your home to pay for college.” What do you think about that?
McKenzie Thomas from Stanford, CA
Ellie: I believe that you should never borrow on your own future to pay for your child’s future. In any discussion of college costs, it’s important to keep priorities straight. Your kid’s education shouldn’t cost you your retirement. This means it’s not a wise idea to take out a home equity loan, an equity line of credit or refinance your mortgage in order to pay for school. This would reduce the amount of equity in your home, increase the risk of possible foreclosure and incur costs in interest charges that may cost more if the term on the new mortgage is greater than the remaining term on the existing mortgage.
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Q. My son-in-law just graduated with his Masters Degree in Education. They have had a hard time while he’s been in school and don’t have the best credit scores. They’ve asked us to co-sign on a new automobile loan and we are reluctant. What do you think about co-signing for loans?
Amanda from Wichita, KS via Ellie Kay’s blog
Ellie: Since you son-in-law needs a co-signer, it means their credit is so risky that no lender will give him money on his own credit history. The question is: why should you? Even though it may come across as “helping a family member out” it’s still a business transaction and when you set the precedence of co-signing on a loan—be prepared to do it again and again. If not for the same person, then for another friend who may say, “well, you did it for Daniel, why not me?” You have to assume you will be the one repaying the loan & you won’t have the associated asset, so it can’t possibly be a good business move.
Ellie Kay
America's Family Financial Expert (R)
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